V is for more than Virgin
I am so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so going to Hell.
Or to Heaven,
depending on what side of the cosmic bed you sleep on…and with Whom…
So I’m practicing some lazy yoga asanas on my floor yesterday, and as I’m laying there all relaxed and meditative and chill in supta badakonasana, I look up at an image of the Virgin Mary I have resting on a high shelf – it’s this awesome kitchy 2 feet by 2 ft poster board image of the Virgin of Guadalupe that my Alexander Technique teacher found in an San Francisco alley and so kindly passed along to me – and that’s when It happened.
Now, in case you don’t know the story of the Virgin of Guadalupe I’ll give you a brief low down: Way back on December 9, 1531 a goddess floating on a moon with stars in her hair appeared to a Mexican Indian, Juan Diego on Tepeyac hill, which used to be a sacred site of the Aztec Moon Goddess, Tonantzin. This goddess asked Juan to build a sacred shrine to her on the hill. Juan freaked out a bit and ran to the local bishop for some reinforcement. The big guy told Juan he needed proof of this supposed miracle. So Juan went back to the hill and explained the deal to the goddess who most likely sighed and rolled her stars, but told him to gather the nearby roses (which shouldn’t have even been blooming since it was the dead of winter), and carry them in his cloak back to the bishop. Juan did as she asked and when he returned to the Bishop, he opened his cloak, the roses tumbled out, and lo and behold, an image of the goddess was imprinted on his cloak. The bishop, using the only lens he had to name spiritual reality, Catholicism, declared that the image was the Virgin Mary. And that’s how an Aztec moon goddess morphed into The Virgin of Guadalupe.
OK, but back to Hell. You know how people “see” the Virgin Mary in their mashed potatoes or in oil spills or in water stains on the side of a house (I believe there’s a movie coming out about this phenomenon shortly)? Well, I saw something truly Holy and SacRED and miraculous in my particular image of the Virgin Mary.
I saw,
gulp,
well,
I saw…..
um,
a Yoni.
Truly. I still do when I look at this poster. In fact, I think I will forever more see a vagina when I look at a similar iconographic representation of the Virgin. The image heading this post is the closest one I could find to the one on my poster, but in reality, my poster is much more vivid than this image in regards to colors, detail, etc.
So, let’s get specific shall we? Relax your gaze, let loose your expectations or preconceived ideas, and take a gentle gander at our fair lady.
Not to get too gynecological on you, but what the hell, it’s Tuesday: The reddish halo with the yellow flaming spikes around her = the Labium Majora, her darker folded robes = the Labium Minora, and in my image, her inner dress is reddish, and her head has a crown on it = the clitoris.
This is so clear to me that I’m in shock. The “Virgin” is also a Vagina, or as Oprah would say, a Va-J-J (and, as many of you know the true meaning of the word Virgin is “one into herself”). Of course of course of course I realize this spontaneous “vision” is due to me using my red “lens” like that Mexican bishop used his Catholic lens, but damn people, in my maybe delusional definitely crazy red universe, this could also be one of the biggest and best cosmic jokes the Goddess has played on the Church.
Whatever it is or isn’t, it’s my intent to spread this new image of the Virgin of Guadalupe like a divine virus, so no one can look at her, love her, pray to her, without also looking, loving, praying to the Great Yoni of us All.
Awomen.
September 3rd, 2008 at 7:30 am
OMGoddess! HILARIOUS! At first I thought that I was going to read that you had denounced the Virgin Mary and was going to spend time in Hell for doing so. But then, out of nowhere, the Virgin Mary becomes a shrine to the vagina! I can’t stop laughing!
September 3rd, 2008 at 9:12 am
You’re not delusional at all! There’s this interesting site, Yoni.com that has candles with pictures of The Great She as a vagina on them. That and a bunch of other stuff that celebrates the sacred gate.
Honestly, I’m not sure how I feel about all the vulva style though, on the one hand it’s empowering, on the other it freaks me out just a little bit.
September 3rd, 2008 at 1:36 pm
Sweet Lady that’s the best thing I’ve heard in a while! A little while ago, the Momma (Goddess) had me do a painting of Her. Well, a part of Her anyway, specifically this part that you’re talking about. I’ve been meaning to take a pic of it and send it to your main site. Okay, gonna go get on that now cause it’s just too synchronistic…
September 3rd, 2008 at 4:38 pm
So save me a seat in Hell, would ya? (How much you wanna bet hell is just Heaven’s south annex?)
September 4th, 2008 at 9:28 am
OMG I absolutely love this story! Thanks for sharing! I never saw it before, either, but its so obvious now! And I totally agree that hell is just another wing of heaven lol
September 5th, 2008 at 9:03 pm
Here is an interesting blog post on the topic http://anaibendai.blogster.com/now_illustratedthe
September 8th, 2008 at 10:27 am
YES! Finally soembody sees through all that crap about seeing the Virgin Mary in toast and tree limbs and anthills and whatnot
This made me laugh so hard…. DAMN is hell going to be a party!
September 9th, 2008 at 7:12 am
hahaha! Fantastic! And obviously not delusional. The blog post that Pink Heels put up is very fascinating as well - well worth the read, and the pics are great. I wonder - if THE Virgin Mary is subconsciously transmitting vaginal vibes, could this be another reason why men find virgins soooo attractive?
September 9th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
on another note: an old roommate of mine had a ceramic statue of a robed St. Peter (that she got from her grams - of all holy people!) that bore a stunning resemblance to a phallus. it was a seminal joke in our house.
September 11th, 2008 at 8:15 am
Sera. You might just be my soul mate. I’m almost regretting that I sold it already! [ahem] So here’s my red moment: I read this post, and a few of the others here on your site and went straight out and bought your book. (You had me at “Do you ever get that funny feeling…”) Anyway, the price sticker on the back was partially covering your photo, and believing you to be incredibly sexy, I peeled it away. But to my frustration, the tag left a sticky residue on your face, and I spent about four minutes (or was it eleven?) trying to get it off. [oh yes, I am so going there] You see, I’m not opposed to sticky stuff on your face, I just wanted it to be MY doing, not some silly price label. Okay, put the phone down, no need to call the cops—this is just harmless (and poorly-executed) flirtation, but there’s NO WAY I could resist mentioning it! In all seriousness—you provoke my thoughts, my feelings, and my passions in ways that until now have only happened in my dreams. Wow. And thank-you! I am also buying a copy of your book for every female I love. (My male friends will have to go buy it themselves, the freeloading bastards…) Thanks again, you crazy, amazing red lady!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:39 am
Check out card #12 from the Jeu de Tarot Égyptien (on MAry K. Greer’s Tarot Blog.)
http://marygreer.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/lubicz03.jpg
Ruby
September 26th, 2008 at 10:13 am
Honestly? That’s what I’ve ALWAYS seen when I’ve looked at Virgin Mary iconography! And it’s not just the Guadalupe version, either! In MOST Catholic imagery, she’s got the whole yoni-thing going on right around her. Occasionally, even Jesus peers out of them, too!